TRUE FIRST TIME TALES
Casey's Tale
This is my true story. I liked how Ray told the other stories on Nifty so I contacted him and asked if he would do my story. He asked me about it and we sent emails back and forth a while until he sent me a story that was pretty good. We fixed some things and then I was happy with it, and here it is.
This is what happened on my sixteenth birthday. It was a few years ago, but I can remember it so clearly. It might have been the most intense night of my entire life.
I was living in Morris, Illinois. Computers at home and the internet were just starting up, there were no porn sites, gay or otherwise, so my sexual knowledge was limited to health class and the bullshit I heard from the other guys in school.
I knew I was different. I knew that I had to hide that from everyone.
On my sixteenth birthday, I had a party with my friends and family at Romine's restaurant on the interstate. Then a big overnight party. My house had a huge basement, and it was pretty much all my playground. Other than some storage in a room in one corner, I got to arrange it how I liked, and spent most of my time and even slept down there sometimes.
Tonight, everyone had brought sleeping bags and pillows, and we were all strewn all around, telling lies and having some laughs. My parents had come down already, so we didn't expect them for the rest of the night.
When it got nice and late, Billy pulled out a plastic sandwich baggie and grinned.
"No way!" most of us said.
I got high for the first time, and so did most of us. Billy, it turned out, was becoming a pothead. In no time at all, we were all giggling and having a blast.
James and Terry started bragging again about having had a blow-job. We knew it was true, they had gotten head from the same girl last month. She was a well-known cock-hound, and any of us could have gotten head from her. There was a rumor that she worked the truck stop on weekends. They both bragged about it, and we asked questions, and it was pretty exciting. We asked why they didn't go get some pussy off her.
"She's probably got AIDS or something. I just let her suck my dick," Terry said.
"She gives great head!" James said.
"How would you know?" Billy asked. "It was the only head you've ever got. It might have been really bad."
"No way," they both said together, smiling really widely.
"She's not as good at it as I am," Mark said.
We were all quiet.
"As you are?" James asked.
James was the sort of leader of me and my friends. He was the biggest, so we sort of let him be the leader, I guess.
"I know you guys are all cool, and I'm fucking tired of hiding it. I'm gay, guys."
We were all quiet again. I was just plain stunned. I thought that maybe he was kidding. James, as usual, took the lead.
"You are not!" he declared loudly.
"I am."
"How do you know?" James asked.
"I just know. I know I don't... I'm not interested in girls. I like guys instead. Okay? And I know you guys won't care. You all say you won't, anyway. You guys never pick on Charlie Stevens, and we all know he is."
Charlie hadn't been hiding that fact since last year. He was a senior and everyone knew about him since he had come out last year. He had been popular, so it had been a big deal and a huge thing. He was still sort of popular and wasn't bothered, and we all sort of thought it was pretty neat. Especially me. I wished many times that I had his guts. Now I was suddenly envious of Mark, too.
"Did you find out by fucking Stevens?" James asked.
Mark got really red-faced.
"No way!" we all said together.
"You can't let him know I let on! Promise!"
We did.
"You really are?" I asked.
He nodded, still blushing.
Mark was really dorky. Hell, we all were. None of us were athletes or popular, all geeks and dorks. And now, two of us, fully one quarter of us, were gay. Though only one was now known about.
I was really torn. I wanted to say that I was too, but it was just way too hard. I really envied Mark a hell of a lot right then.
"Prove it," James said.
"What? How? Suck you all off or something? Idiot."
James had that smile on, and I knew he was thinking exactly that. Mark recognized it too, then. And the others.
It had to be the pot. I mean, we'd never messed around with it before, so I had to think it was that.
Mark blushed really darkly. We all looked around at each other. We were all giggling and blushing.
"I'm not letting a guy touch my junk," Kevin said.
He was always a stick. No matter what was up, he was the one not up for it.
"I will," I said.
I was more shocked than anyone else. I couldn't believe I had said it. I was thinking it, but when Kevin said that, it just came out of me. I felt my face go totally red and an instant sweat start up. I started cussing at myself in my head.
Mark was almost staring at me, his mouth hanging open.
"Yeah, Casey can go first," James said.
"No, you can, your idea," I said, hoping to regain some dignity.
"Your birthday," James said back at me. "He can give you a big old birthday kiss."
That was one of the slang phrases for blow-jobs back then. I stared at him as he stared at me.
"Ain't got the balls?" he asked with a snicker.
"You ain't got the cojones either," William said to James.
"Watch me," James said.
He stood up and whipped it out.
"No way!" Mark said, sounding kind of mad. "I'm not even going to, asshole!"
"Prove you're gay. Or else we'll know you're just trying to be oh so cool," James said, waving his dick.
I couldn't look away from it. I could only see the pale, peach-colored head in his fingers. I really wanted to see more of it.
"I think you're gay," Billy said. "You dared him, and you keep daring him."
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but I didn't claim to be. Mark does. And I call bullshit. He's just trying to be one of those jerks who cashes in on it."
"I'm not!" Mark said angrily.
"Then prove it!"
"No!"
"I will."
Again, I was more shocked than anyone else there. And again, I blamed the pot. I was thinking it, but never, ever, intended to say it out loud. Everyone looked at me. Stared at me. I was horrified. I wished I hadn't smoked any of that pot.
"You are, aren't you?" Mark asked.
I swallowed. It was really hard to do. I nodded. I felt like I was going to die or something.
"You are?" Terry asked.
He was probably my best friend. I looked at him and felt like I was betraying him somehow. Why not come clean on it? I thought. I nodded at him, hoping to God that he didn't start hating me.
"Prove it," James said, waving his dick at me now.
"I will, but not in front of everybody," I said.
And again, I was more surprised than anybody else. But I really wanted to do it. It was like I had to or something. It seemed like the chance of a lifetime.
James' jaw dropped.
"No way," he said softly.
I guess he wasn't expecting me to. That sort of energized me. I had one up on James! That was a real first! And way too good to pass up on!
I stood up and waved him toward the corner storage room. He just stood there with his dork in his hand, mouth hanging open.
I got to the door and opened it, and he was still just standing there, looking stunned, like a deer in headlights.
"Go on James!" Bill sing-songed.
"Yeah, go on, James!" others joined.
He looked around, got really pale, and put his peter away.
"Nah, I was just teasing," he said and sat back down.
It was a first! I had bested James!
"I will," Mark said, stood up, and walked over to me.
He looked right in my eyes as he walked past me and into the room. He turned on the light and waited. I walked in and closed the door. I stared at him.
"So, you really gonna?" he asked.
I swallowed.
I wanted to, that was for sure.
"You really gay?" I asked.
"Yeah. You?"
I nodded.
"Honest?" he asked.
I nodded again.
"So, well... how about I do it to you first?"
"Uh, okay."